Hair Terrorism

While returning from West Texas I passed through several gas stations, stops, and tolls—all of which had security cameras.

Apparently, while spying on the entire population of the very country on which they were not supposed to spy on, various screengrabs of my haircut raised some red flags in some secret hair database.

Back home, I was approached by Homeland Security who were so astonished by my bad haircut, they asked if I wanted to file a Hair Terrorism Incident Report.

So, I did that.

The culprit who cut my hair is now on a Hair Terrorism Watch List as well as a Cut But Do Not Wash List.



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